what is the point of posting on social media

 what is the point of posting on social media. i guess i've finally won because i met someone that treats me nicely, and calls me nice names. he's everything i ever wanted with more variety. 

i don't see a point of dressing up as a "cute puppy girl" for instagram because, well, unless all of my followers are my partners, that's just being too vulnerable in my honest opinion.

i try to draw art and i only peak five likes. i am grateful for those likes, but then i see literal scribbles get more interactions than me.

i do my makeup, and instead of getting lots of engagements, i get people that copy my makeup exactly and get more interactions than me. 

it just feels meaningless but i don't want to be out of the loop as well. how do i keep failing at the social media game? i guess it's something you get better at the more and more you try at it. i just feel like i invested too much time into stupidity. 

i'm not happy with how i'm being perceived in my posts. i try to make "lazy content" which is looking into the camera with a caption for interaction bait, and still, nothing. i'm wasting my own time. i'm just going to archive everything. this is probably triggering my OCD, for some godforsaken reason. also, my "friend" who i thought would support me online kept talking badly about me indirectly about how i am in a fictional fantasy world. how is that supposed to be supportive in the slightest?

i just wish more room was made for me to be more happier.

that's it. goodbye