grieving my original blog

hi.

so i miss my original blog that i started over last year's summer.. i tried my best to compose this idea and plan this blog while i was recovering. it quickly became a mere memory after this "friend" seemed to tell everyone about what i was going through, and made me seem like i'm a awful person by sending all of these strangers to my blog. i deleted every instance of the blog from our messages because i didn't trust her anymore after she kept replying carelessly to me. it felt like she didn't care about me. she felt neutral at best towards me and that's not really a friendship i want to have around. 

i was attacked with repetitive negative comments with no one wanting to even try to settle things out and have a series of forgiveness. then i remember commenting a supportive message on a friend's blog, but they got my ip address, so that was awkward. both of my parents worked with technology especially when it was starting to get popular all over the world, so they "know how this online world works", so they recommended for me to delete my blog so the hate comments would stop.

it put me through meaningless pain. i don't hope for that person who put me through that to be happy, at all. 

i just wanted to be left alone. what is it with idiots obsessively attacking strangers they don't know over the internet, when it's so much more easier to just ignore my existence and just vent to yourself. i'm not forgiving any one of those individuals. i might reconnect with that person who supported me through that tough time, even though it was awkward that they knew my ip address. that was one downside of wordpress, and i feel uncomfortable on wordpress, so i won't be returning there anytime soon. i feel safe on blogger. you'd most likely find me on livejournal or even on youtube if blogger were to shut down anytime soon, though. 

that's it for now. it hurts because it feels like no one cares, and somehow this was all "karma" even though i was just confiding in a friend. it was a hard beginning of the year. that's it.

goodbye